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MATTS-MATICS: NY Jets vs NY Rangers |
BRAVE Fan Talks REDSKINS
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SABRES, PENS, SHOTGUNS & METS |
BILL BUCKNER WAS INNOCENT |
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Spring Break Training PART I |
Spring Break Training PART II |
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TheMatts
Posts:1640
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| 09-06-2008 - SelecA - |
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CAPITOL HILL, DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA – Let’s face it; us humans are pretty self-centered lot. We go about our daily grind as though we really give a rat’s behind about others but ultimately, it’s all about Numero Uno – not Ocho Cinco, as the RFKAC (Receiver Formerly Known As Chad) would have one believe. No, we’re all about getting ourselves taken care of AND THEN (perhaps) seeing if anybody else needs a hand. It’s the same with politics. Here’s our MTM view on Election ’08 based on variables fed to our Matts-Matics computer: Those with money want to be taxed less and will pay for their own stuff. Those without money want stuff and need somebody else to pay for it. Matt and I fall into both categories thrice daily simply because the stuff we want or don’t want changes on a minute-by-minute basis. When we make money, we want to keep it all. We don’t want some dirty, philthy so-and-so getting their grimy mitts on even one cent. When we aren’t making money, we want the philthy rich to stop whining and buck up for their fellow man. Because of our ambiguously Hippocratic makeup, we label ourselves DemPubliMatts. Come November, we want a candidate that will address the issue that we have an unwavering and constant opinion on; one that directly impacts each and every one of us: THE COST OF BEING A FAN! You know what we’re talking about. You feel our pain. It doesn’t matter if you’re Susan B. Anthony or Sam Hill, you’re getting gouged at every turn. Take a typical baseball game here in New York, for instance. Your tickets are likely in the $50 dollar range. Parking is $15. Beers are $8. Last night we had $62 seats, 4 beers each (we sweat A LOT!), bought 4 more beers for our pals and had two sausage sandwiches at $8 a pop. We also tipped about $10. That’s $261 for a 9 inning baseball game. Under the assumption that we are a couple, our ICC (Inning Couple Cost) is $29 per inning. THAT IS TOO MUCH MONEY FOR AN INNING OF BASEBALL. That price, People That Vote, is only going to INCREASE. Next year, the new baseball stadiums will make the current Cost Of Being A Fan seem almost fair. The same will be true of the new home for the Giants and Jets. We need to stop this insanity and stop it now. Come November, the only thing we care about as selfish, greedy sports fanatics is the COST OF BEING A FAN! The candidate that brings that down, gets our vote. End of story. Check out our Brand New bit with the Brave Skins Fan, chime in below, set your home pages to MTM and look for Rex O’Rourke tomorrow. THANK YOU. P.s… You can always Vote For Pedro. P.s... It cost us $71 per quarter for the Giants/Pats pre-season game (not including the cost of our newly printed biz cards that Security Guard 1105 confiscated).
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Johnny9X
Posts:45
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| 09-06-2008 - SelecA - |
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| Good meeting you clowns last night. pelfrey pitched good enuff to win - gotta score to win! good article today 2... pedro needs to step up. |
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Matt's Friend John
Posts:36
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| 09-06-2008 - SelecA - |
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| Those orange jackets are ungodly. Linen is a nice touch though. McCain wants to cut taxes so maybe he is the one that will help bring the COBAF down. |
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gollytwo
Posts:74
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| 09-06-2008 - SelecP - |
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| Phil Graham was right, although unpolitic in stating it outloud, we are a nation of whiners |
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ActiveForums 3.6
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How Philly Won |
One Of Our First
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ROY HOBBS ON STEROIDS??? |
MEAGHAN & JAKE: COOLEST FANS |
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Nobody Remembers The Loser |
Giant/Super Tuesday |
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MATTS-MATICS: Hockey Nuts Go At It |
See us on: "Law & Order" |
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MATT FACTS:
Plaxico Burress is no longer spokesman for Thigh Master. Chad Pennington is NOT a Brett Favre fan... Hillary Clinton and Don Nelson have never been seen in the same place... Jerry Manuel is not related to Charlie ManuelJerry Manuel is not related to Charlie Manuel... Somebody namd Michel coaches the Pittsburgh Penguins... Tiki Barber quit the Giants. The Giants then won the Super Bowl... The New England Patriots only lost ONE game out of 19!!! Aaron Heilman was actually funny in re to Eli and Plaxico Burress helping the Mets as a pitcher and outfielder, respectively. Repeat, Heilman was funny... Jessica Simpson would rather date Tom Brady - trust us... Eli Manning is better than Archie - now... Alyssa Milano is a Met fan. RRRRR... Rickey Henderson speaks in the 3rd Person... Shawn Green has big ears... Howard Johnson likes to stay at the Holiday Inn, ironically... Sandy Alomar, Sr. is the youngest of 9 kids. That's why he was quick around the dish. Jiminy Cricket was the Philly Phanatic in a previous life…Fred Wilpon is pals with Sandy Koufax... Mike Ditka is a really tough guy.. Buffalo has a Triple A baseball team. They are NOT called The Snowballs... Chan Ho Park has people thinking of naming a ballfield after him - it would be called Chan Ho Park Park... John Maine has never been, oddly enough, to Maine... Curt Gowdy, Jr. has never been to Yellow Knife, Canada... Kevin Mitchell played 6 positions for the Mets in '86 and, according to Doc Gooden's book, didn't like cats... John Olerud & Wayne Gretzky have never been seen in the same place... Kevin McReynolds now makes his living doing laugh tracks for sit-coms... Tony Gwynn is nearing 300 lbs... Carlos Beltran has Mercedes Benz dealerships named for him in Barcelona, Spain... Willie Montanez was called Guillermo by Lenny Randle... Rusty Staub beat Jeff Kent in a race – TODAY... Jay Horwitz is a dynamite Cricket players – somebody said... Jeff Wilpon was a decent minor league catcher... Ziggy Palfy lives in Slovakia and is a big Met fan... Superman Returns, yet still can’t hit Billy Wagner... David Wright will win the Triple Crown – on a horse... Omar Minaya is Tobey McGuire’s stunt-double in Spider Man 3... Hilary Clinton has Mr. Met pajamas – we think... Albert Einstein was a HUGE Met fan... The Metropolitan Opera House was named for the Mets after their 2nd season in ’63... Wally Backman, ’86 sparkplug, considered changing his name to Wally Back-Matt... Neil Allen and Mike Stanton, former Mets, have Allen & Stanton Streets on Lower East Side named for them.
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