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Spring Break Training PART I |
Spring Break Training PART II |
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SABRES, PENS, SHOTGUNS & METS |
BILL BUCKNER WAS INNOCENT |
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Sam's-a-fan
Posts:909
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| 09-04-2008 - SelecP - |
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Who carried his cash in a bucket.
But his daughter, named Nan
Ran away with a man
and as for the bucket Nantucket
Okay so the pressure's on. I've been challenged to come up with a good one and to give Cookie some politics and some football.
Here we go.
Go Giants!
As for politics yesterday the Matts brought you elitist foreign poetry. Feh! In response I hereby give you the poetry of the regular guy. The poetry for thems of us who eat ice berg lettuce and who never organized a community. The poetry hunt polar bear. The poetry of John McCain and Sarah Palin. The limerick.
There once was a man named Willie
Whose players made him look very silly
The team was caught in a spell
Along came Jerry Manuel
and now we're three up on Philly
A Cy Young in both leagues would be grand
For Johan, that's just what we planned
But he goes nine when he starts
Or the team breaks his heart
No matter the sluggers he's fanned
Billy Wagner has been on the DL
And of late, the pens doing well
But now Wags' on the rebound
Soon to throw off a mound
There goes the season, oh well
There once was a man named Omar
Who thought he could take the Mets far
He sacked Willie with no class
On Alou he should've passed
We beg you Fred Wilpon, no more!
The Reyes brothers Jose, Argenis and Al
While at dinner with some of their pals
Said they may call us three kings
When we have World Series rings
A little bit later this fall
A dizzy young fella named Ryan
All season kept tryin' and tryin'
To get up out of bed
But alas 'twas his head
And the doctors, they just wasn't buyin'
A towering tribute to Doc
Once stood on the 42nd Street block
Across the Hudson he faced
To his career's end he did race
A cautionary tale to would be pro-jocks
On one knee Cleon dropped with the catch
The Amazins had won their big match
Reminding all who are down
The Apples an NL town
But you all know that, now didn't you, natch!
To SNY goes my strong plea
Bring Meet the Matts to a station near me
Neither Loud Mouths nor Beer Money
Bring the smarts or the funny
Like two well suited bald men, you'll see!
One Mr. Chavez wears a larcenous glove
From the fans he gets lots of love
Though Scott Rolen it seems
Is now afraid of his dreams
In which Endy steals homers, and flies like a dove
A dazzling young lefty named Koosman
In '76 did more winnin' than losin'
But to the Padres R. Jones
Cy Young's award goes
To us Met fans, Jerry's still superhuman! |
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Yankee Joe
Posts:375
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| 09-05-2008 - SelecA - |
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| Samantha - dont quit your day job. |
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Cookie
Posts:592
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| 09-05-2008 - SelecA - |
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Wow Sam... so many limericks!! Now i see why you weren't a fan of the Haikus. Limericks are your forte. Bummed we didn't get a Gints or McPalin limerick though.
On McPalin... Question: Do we really want a President who says 'Warshington?' or.. a Vice President who sounds like Margie from 'Fargo?'
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Linda
Posts:96
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| 09-05-2008 - SelecA - |
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| Sam - you missed your calling! Don't listen to Yankee Joe... And Loudmouths is okay but Beer Money is awful and The Matts ABSOLUTELY are better than anything they have. What is the story there??? |
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jgclancy
Posts:438
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| 09-05-2008 - SelecA - |
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| But Sam's day job is editing poetry!! Well maybe not but I have to say that Randy Jones deserved that Cy Young award. Go Giants!! |
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vincent
Posts:137
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| 09-05-2008 - SelecA - |
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| Got to retire Koosman's number! And the Matts could have his retirement on their new SNY show! That will give us something after the season ends. |
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ActiveForums 3.6
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MATTS-MATICS: NY Jets vs NY Rangers |
BRAVE Fan Talks REDSKINS
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ROY HOBBS ON STEROIDS??? |
MEAGHAN & JAKE: COOLEST FANS |
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Nobody Remembers The Loser |
Giant/Super Tuesday |
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MATTS-MATICS: Hockey Nuts Go At It |
See us on: "Law & Order" |
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MATT FACTS:
Chad Pennington is NOT a Brett Favre fan... Hillary Clinton and Don Nelson have never been seen in the same place... Jerry Manuel is not related to Charlie ManuelJerry Manuel is not related to Charlie Manuel... Somebody namd Michel coaches the Pittsburgh Penguins... Tiki Barber quit the Giants. The Giants then won the Super Bowl... The New England Patriots only lost ONE game out of 19!!! Aaron Heilman was actually funny in re to Eli and Plaxico Burress helping the Mets as a pitcher and outfielder, respectively. Repeat, Heilman was funny... Jessica Simpson would rather date Tom Brady - trust us... Eli Manning is better than Archie - now... Alyssa Milano is a Met fan. RRRRR... Rickey Henderson speaks in the 3rd Person... Shawn Green has big ears... Howard Johnson likes to stay at the Holiday Inn, ironically... Sandy Alomar, Sr. is the youngest of 9 kids. That's why he was quick around the dish. Jiminy Cricket was the Philly Phanatic in a previous life…Fred Wilpon is pals with Sandy Koufax... Mike Ditka is a really tough guy.. Buffalo has a Triple A baseball team. They are NOT called The Snowballs... Chan Ho Park has people thinking of naming a ballfield after him - it would be called Chan Ho Park Park... John Maine has never been, oddly enough, to Maine... Curt Gowdy, Jr. has never been to Yellow Knife, Canada... Kevin Mitchell played 6 positions for the Mets in '86 and, according to Doc Gooden's book, didn't like cats... John Olerud & Wayne Gretzky have never been seen in the same place... Kevin McReynolds now makes his living doing laugh tracks for sit-coms... Tony Gwynn is nearing 300 lbs... Carlos Beltran has Mercedes Benz dealerships named for him in Barcelona, Spain... Willie Montanez was called Guillermo by Lenny Randle... Rusty Staub beat Jeff Kent in a race – TODAY... Jay Horwitz is a dynamite Cricket players – somebody said... Jeff Wilpon was a decent minor league catcher... Ziggy Palfy lives in Slovakia and is a big Met fan... Superman Returns, yet still can’t hit Billy Wagner... David Wright will win the Triple Crown – on a horse... Omar Minaya is Tobey McGuire’s stunt-double in Spider Man 3... Hilary Clinton has Mr. Met pajamas – we think... Albert Einstein was a HUGE Met fan... The Metropolitan Opera House was named for the Mets after their 2nd season in ’63... Wally Backman, ’86 sparkplug, considered changing his name to Wally Back-Matt... Neil Allen and Mike Stanton, former Mets, have Allen & Stanton Streets on Lower East Side named for them.
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